Fatherhood and the Friendship Recession

A new baby brings a lot of changes to a father's life. The household is busy. Demands go up and support flows in for the child. What often is missing for many men is social support. There is a so-called "friendship recession" for fathers.

What Is the Friendship Recession?

A friendship recession is the shrinking social life of new fathers. In other words, many fathers feel alone. Over the last decade, most men say they have fewer close friends.

Why New Fathers Struggle to Maintain Friendships

New fathers tend to be busier with taking care of their baby. And that's on top of work and other responsibilities. Instead of meeting up with a friend for dinner or playing a round of golf, they use that time to change diapers, put together a crib or paint a nursery. New fathers might also skip regular calls or check-ins with friends. They allow contact to lapse for longer periods of time. All of this results in a lot of fathers feeling lonely.

Why Loneliness Is a Health Issue, Not Just a Mood

Loneliness, or an ongoing lack of social and emotional support, is a health issue. It's more than an unhappy mood.

Loneliness is a known risk factor for:

• Heart disease
• Depression
• Dementia
• Shorter lifespan

Researchers have compared the ill effects of loneliness to the harmful impact of daily smoking. That is to say: Social support is very important to a new father's health in both the short term and the long term.

Small Steps That Help

You don't have to be a social butterfly with a crowded calendar to get the benefits of friendship. Instead, try these small but helpful steps:

• Reconnect with a friend. A short text counts.
• Schedule one weekly, low-effort activity with a friend.
• Take advantage of shared-parent settings, like a park.
• Join a new father group near you.

Many communities, churches or hobby groups naturally encourage social support. You might be surprised at the support that exists in your neighborhood or city.

When to Reach Out for More Support

If you find yourself feeling sad often or for a long time, it's a good idea to reach out for support. Your Baptist Health behavioral care provider is here to help. If you don't have a primary care provider, you can find one by using our provider directory.